♥ this has gotta end.

what is love?really..i don't at all comprehend what am i thinking sometimes..i try to tell myself that its all my mentality that is making me feel like that but at the end of the day,i don't think so..i really feel terrible that im feeling this way..i don't wanna like anyone i don't wanna have any crushes but is this even possible?my life is really driving me insane coz its irritating thati have to constantly wake up and remind myself the hopelessness of this stupid situation..why is impossiblity so easy to yearn for?this is just pure torture and sheer pain..there s so much i wanna say but words just get in the way..perhaps its just a crush but arent crushes not supposed to be so painful?

i just heard that my friend's friend commited suicide the other day..i've met her once..ok i know this is something really mean to say but i think its sort of heart warming for her to be in a more beautiful and nice place than the earth.after all i sincerely believe that she is much too good for this crude reality of this world...

haha..i sound so emo today..i dunno wazzup with me either,i just don't feel right though nth happened..guess its becaouse of the tiredness im feeling..i went for like 4shopping trips in the last 3days..lol..i'm a total shopaholic:)..i bought 4tops,2bottom and even 3 dress!!so now i slacking im complete comfort in the privacy of my own room:) although i cant help feeling emo..everyone is out shopping today so i cant call them :( ...guess i'll just try later tonite..in the meantime i might as well try if ben's & jerry will make me feel better:)...yum yum yum!!!